Many people are finding themselves burnt out by endless scrolling, dating apps, news feeds, online arguments, and the corporate tyranny that comes with online engagement.
Dating apps out, in-person Meet me in the Trader Joe’s produce aisle
Courtesy of Trader’s Joe
Case in point, in Hayes Valley, San Francisco, singles recently turned a Trader Joe’s into a Valentine’s Day mingle zone. Hundreds of singles packed the produce aisles and frozen section, treating a weeknight grocery run like a series of low-stakes first dates. People showed up with roses, name tags, and conversation prompts, and event organizer Maggie Carroll said she wanted a relaxed, permission-to-flirt vibe where strangers could meet without the pressure of a bar or a dating app.
“Years ago, I got asked out by someone at a Trader Joe’s,” said Franny, a 28-year-old woman who was invited by a friend. The suitor’s pick-up line was a subtle “Can I have the key to your heart? I mean, cart!”
More than 500 people RSVP’d to a public Partiful listing, and attendees were encouraged to make optional donations benefiting the San Francisco‑Marin Food Bank.
Anna, the store manager at Hayes Valley Trader Joe’s, told SW Newsmagazine that she’s not allowed to comment on the event, however, Carroll told reporters that “Trader Joe’s is kind of a flirty grocery store,” and said she landed on the Hayes Valley location because it felt more spacious than other TJ’s in the city.
“Trader Joe’s is kind of a flirty grocery store”
The event was not officially affiliated with Trader Joe’s, and organizers reminded guests to be courteous to workers while they handed out roses and name tags.
In Los Angeles, Rusted Lantern Singles, is a social meet-up group that takes place every Saturday night, with the goal of bringing people together for friendship, or even love.
It’s likely that more events will be cropping up in cities everywhere, as more and more people desire to meet IRL. Choosing to unplug from technology—with a strong craving to have the intimacy and opportunity to have meaningful conversations, and even the possibility of blooming romantic relationships, or in the least, building lasting friendships.
Why people are going offline
Public research organization TalkerResearch conducted a survey of 2,000 Americans that revealed about half now deliberately carve out screen-free time, and most say the decision is paying off: they feel more productive, more present, and less like life is happening exclusively behind a thin slip of tech in their hands.
The biggest drivers of this shift are Gen Z. Sixty-three percent now intentionally unplug, the highest rate of any generation. Millennials aren’t far behind, followed by Gen X and baby boomers.
What was once used as a consistent way to de-stress has become a source of tension, anxiety, debate, and boredom.
It all began to change once the wealthy and powerful started staking their claims across the internet, turning a once weird and beautiful place into a toxic corporate wasteland that only benefits their own interests, a.k.a. their own bottom lines.
With the time that used to be taken up by a screen, people are writing in notebooks, using paper calendars, reading books, playing board games, meeting in person, and buying alarm clocks that keep phones out of the bedroom.
Where to Gather Offline
Alisoun suggests a few ways you can meet people in-person.
Attend local clubs, classes, courses, and events
If you want more local friends to talk to or go out with, local activities where you can meet like-minded people are a good starting point. Prioritise the activities you’re most excited about. To find local groups, do an online search, and check out notice boards in local shops, your library or health centre, or local Facebook groups.
Volunteer for causes or projects to meet people with similar values
Volunteering can be an empowering way to feel you’re making a difference, add meaning to your life, and meet new people with shared interests or values. You can volunteer regularly or on a one-off basis, depending on your needs, desires, and availability. If you’re looking for local friends, explore opportunities to volunteer in your immediate community. Likewise, if you want to take a stand for something important to you, you could get involved in campaigns, fundraising events, or demonstrations.
Join a support group
If you’re struggling with anything in your life, there are likely to be support groups that can help and will introduce you to others in a similar position – either online or in person. I know that twenty years ago I would have welcomed a support group to help me come to terms with becoming involuntarily childless. It would also have been good to have had more childless friends to talk to and go out with.
“Unity is strength.. when there is teamwork and collaboration, wonderful
things can be achieved.” —Mattie Stepanek, meet-up attendee
Get the Word Out
Deborah Edwards-Oñoro, an organizer with over 12-years of experience planning meet-ups, says the landscape has changed, and it’s imperative to use word-of-mouth to spread the news.
“Much has changed in the past few years about publicizing events.”
Newsletters, mailing lists, and social media worked in the past to spread news about events. But many people have unsubscribed from newsletters and mailing lists as well as closed down their social media accounts. Your event promotion work is a lot harder. Good news though! Word of mouth is still effective. And I’m not saying avoid newsletters, mailing lists, and social media. One option is to ask your meet-up members how they want to learn about an upcoming event.
Another option is to schedule and announce events two to three months ahead of time, so your meetup members can plan their schedule.”
Dating App Decline Is Real—Daters Prefer In-Person Connections
What was once a hugely popular tool for meeting potential mates and lovers, has now become passé.
Popular dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge are seeing major drops in user numbers. Tinder alone lost nearly 500,000 users in 2025, with Bumble and Hinge also suffering big losses. In the U.S., a 2023 study found that nearly 80% of college students are skipping dating apps entirely.
Companies are struggling too. Bumble’s stock dropped 30% in 2024 after disappointing earnings, and Match Group has seen fewer paying users for over seven quarters.
Online daters are getting tired of bad experiences and empty conversations. Users are complaining about shallow matches, endless swiping, and pricey subscriptions that don’t guarantee love. For many, dating apps have become more stressful than helpful.
With apps losing their appeal, real-life dating is making a comeback. Singles are meeting through speed dating, running clubs, and hobby meetups. This trend is called “intentional dating,” and it focuses on making meaningful connections offline.
Matchmaking services and private dating clubs are also rising in popularity. They promise curated matches and a break from endless swiping.
Global Day of Unplugging
Fortunately, those of us looking for an excuse to do some unplugging need to look no further than March 6-7. This is when participants in the Global Day of Unplugging will power down their digital devices in a concerted effort to reconnect with themselves, family, friends, and their communities for 24 hours. Not to say that such an event must fall at a specific time for everyone, but unplugging on this day requires intentionality. According to research by Asurion, Americans today check their phone once every 10 minutes on average. Many times, we are completely oblivious to this behavior, and these habits are maintained subconsciously.
While the Global Day of Unplugging was started with the Sabbath in mind for Jewish people to adapt their ancient ancestral ritual to the modern-day, the benefits would ring true for all religions, races, and creeds. As the founders of this movement note: “We increasingly miss out on the important moments of our lives as we pass the hours with our noses buried in our devices.”
The Case for Unplugging
Improved Sleep
Electronic devices like smartphones, tablets, and computers give off blue light, which can stop your body from making melatonin normally. This can make it harder to fall asleep and stay asleep. It is possible to increase the quality of your sleep by disconnecting from technology before going to bed. This will allow you to wake up feeling more rested and rejuvenated than you did previously. Taking a break from technology, particularly in the hours leading up to bedtime, can result in improved sleep quality and quantity.
Boosted Productivity
A significant amount of distraction may be caused by constant messages and alerts, which can make it difficult to concentrate on activities and reduce overall productivity. The ability to disconnect from technology enables you to get rid of these distractions and concentrate on the work at hand, which in turn enables you to accomplish more in a shorter amount of time.
Reduced Stress and Anxiety
It is possible to reduce levels of stress and anxiety by taking a break from technology to relax and recharge. Numerous studies have demonstrated that an excessive amount of screentime can result in elevated levels of stress, anxiety, and melancholy. You may boost your mental health by giving your mind a chance to digitally detox by taking a vacation from the digital world. This will allow your mind to function more effectively. Taking a break from technology can also help minimize feelings of FOMO, which stands for “fear of missing out,” as well as thoughts of comparison to other people on these platforms.
Better Physical Health
Spending less time in front of a screen can help reduce eye strain, headaches, and posture-related problems. In addition to contributing to unhealthy habits and bad physical health, spending an excessive amount of time sitting in front of a computer does not help. The act of disconnecting from technology motivates us to move our bodies and participate in activities that require physical exertion, such as going for a walk, running, or playing sports. It is possible that this will result in enhanced cardiovascular health, a decreased chance of developing chronic illnesses, and an overall improvement in fitness.
Stronger Relationships
Putting aside your electronic gadgets will allow you to cultivate better ties with the individuals in your immediate environment. When it comes to developing strong and lasting connections, face-to-face contact is very necessary. If we spend an excessive amount of time gazing at screens, we may overlook our connections with people in real life, which can result in a weakening of our relationships with our friends and family.
Taking the time to unplug from your tech devices has many benefits. It enhances productivity and focus, fosters deeper real-world relationships, and allows for increased self-awareness. This practice promotes better physical health, mental clarity, and improved emotional well-being.
According to Kostadin Kushlev, associate professor of psychology in the College of Arts & Sciences, “Even though it seems insurmountable, just a little bit of digital detox—a little bit of reduction of the constant stimulation from our phones, social media, games and so forth—could actually help us reclaim our ingrained ability to sustain attention.”
Main image: Courtesy of Photo by OurWhisky Foundation
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